Recently I was looking at the photos of my son I have stored on my computer and I realized that there are none from 2014. I then looked at my camera & phone to find that I have taken only 18 photos of my son in 2014. It's not because I've forgotten, it's because my son doesn't want me taking his picture. He doesn't have a problem with being photographed in general, but he would rather have me playing with him than photographing him. I would like to have more pictures of him, it actually makes me feel sad and somewhat guilty that I don't, but respecting my son's wishes is more important. And one of his wishes is for me to put the camera away and live in the moment. He doesn't care about have his life documented, he cares about enjoying his life with the people he loves.
There are other things my son doesn't enjoy, like holiday celebrations and birthday parties. So we don't do them. The only holiday my son does enjoy is Halloween, and that's because he loves going for walks. He won't wear a costume, though, he just wears a hat with ears on it. I would love to make him a ridiculously elaborate Halloween costume, but he doesn't want to wear one, so I don't. He just doesn't have any interest in any other holidays, and that's fine.
I've actually been harassed by other people for not forcing my son to participate in activities he doesn't like. A woman actually told me that I was abusing my son because I didn't take him Easter egg hunting against his will. And yes, the woman knew my son didn't want to go hunt eggs, but she thought I should force him to anyway, because it's a "right of passage." That's ridiculous. It's not abusive to respect my son's wishes, not respecting his wishes would be abuse.
